Misery Business
by lildreamer1112
Summary: Bella left 15 years and now she's back. Will everything go back to the way it was or will Edward continue to hate her for what she did. Lemons in later chapter. OOC slightly.
1. Chapter 1

-1

**A/N: I know, I know I posted another new story today and I need to update The Wedding Planner BUT I was working on this for another story and decided I much rather write it for Twilight. It is a little bit OOC and AU but it's different. I also have chapter 2 already written. Alright R&R and let me know it you like it. And yes there will be lemons later. Much love, LilD**

A man glanced around his newly decorated office. It once had been a storage room for extra paper and the things people lost on a daily basis. In other words it had been a nice sized storage room and when the company had decided to promote their rookie to co president, it had been the best option for the new office. The walls that had been white with yellow lines outlining where shelves had been located, had been painted a very dark blue. The old copiers and printers that no longer worked but had never been thrown out had been replaced with a big desk, chairs, a small table, and shelves. It was the perfect office. It even had a window facing the outside world unlike the old cubicle he'd once had.

Edward Anthony Cullen sighed as he plopped into his black leather desk chair. His fingers danced around the edge of his desk for a couple of minutes before he reached for his missed calls that his secretary Angela Webber had written down for him. Some he threw into the trash and others he put in a pile. A pile he was sure he would call back….in a couple of days.

Angela walked into his office and laid that days mail on his desk. "I'm leaving to get my hair done now." Edward looked up at her thick, dark hair wildly dancing around her face in curls that she favored now. He had known Angela since kindergarten in school and had even tried dating her a couple of times. But it was hard dating one of your good friends crush. Angela had married Ben Copely, one of Edward's basketball teammates, a couple of years after high school.

Edward glanced through his mail and noted there was nothing important. "Are you getting your hair done for me?"

Angela laughed as she walked to the doorway. "Of course Edward. You were always my boy next door love. No one gets over that kinda love." Edward rose to follow her. It was true that she had "loved" him and he had always been considered a boy next door.

Angela had sauntered her way to her desk and Edward leaned against the doorway to his office. "Well don't tell Ben. I don't need to get beat up," he said with a smile. He could smell her perfume. Even in high school she had chosen the same perfume. Fantasy by Britney Spears. Some things never changed.

"Oh he knows," she said with a smile as she swung her Coach purse onto her shoulder. Edward never understood why she carried a purse that looked more like a tote. "But he knows I would never get mixed up with a guy like you."

"And why is that Ang?" Edward asked casually as he crossed his arms across his chest. His emerald eyes watching her closely.

"Everyone knows not to get mixed up with you Edward. You like to dip your toe into a pool but never get all the way in. You like to go the mile but you don't even make it a quarter of the way. You to women is like an anorexic to a chocolate sampler. You take a couple of nibbles of a piece then throw it away for a new one. You never eat a whole one."

"I know a couple of people who could set you straight on that," he said as Angela smiled and walked away.

She wasn't the first to tell him that. A lot of women thought he should settle down and get married. Maybe drive an SUV and buy that house that just made people assume you have the perfect life. He didn't personally think this was necessary seeing that Emmet had gotten married and had children. Emmet had married a girl he met in college, Rosalie Hale. They had three children, two girls and a boy. Emmet drove his children to soccer while Rosalie took care of their youngest daughter who was only eight months. She even had a Plymouth Voyager, a typical family car. And Edward was comfortable only being an uncle.

Emmet worked with Edward. They were both top lawyers at Benson, Jackson, and Cullen.

However Edward at 33 had been their for a substantial more time then Emmet since he had constantly changed his major.

After Edward had returned to his desk, he saw the clock said 1:30. He decided to return the more then a half a dozen of phone calls he had piled up. It was a Friday and hoped the day would go by quickly. After he hung up the phone for the last call he heard a knock on his door before it opened. Glancing at the clock as it clicked to 5.

Emmet walked in and fell into one of the chairs facing Edward's desk. "Well I'm out of here. I have to take Alley to her dance recital," he said. Alley was the oldest of his three children at six. "Are you going to make it to her recital?"

Edward dropped his pen that he had been writing with and leaned back in his chair. He always tried to go to his niece and nephew's recitals and games. "Not tonight. Newton's bachelor party is tonight at Showtime. I told him I would stop by tonight." Yeah even Newton was getting married. He hadn't been a player like Edward, but in college and a little after he had had partied with many girls. Now he was giving up his freedom for a pair of matching wedding bands.

"Will there be strippers there?" Emmet asked with a half smirk.

"I would imagine. It is a bachelor party after all."

"So your telling me you would rather watch naked women and drink alcohol then watch your niece dance to an upbeat Disney song?"

Edward smiled his trademark half smile. He tapped his chin to make it appear he was hard at thought. "You know it was a tough decision. Watch half naked women fight for your attention and hard earned dollars or watch six year olds try to dance."

Emmet laughed as he said, "Lucky bastard." Edward looked at his brother as he laughed. Many people had though he would grow up to look like the rest of the Cullen's. Emmet had proven them all wrong. Instead of having the trademark blonde or copper hair, he had almost jet black hair. He was extremely tall and appeared as if he was on steroids. "Well if you need someone to drive you home, call me up."

Their parents had been killed by a drunk drive just a week after Edward's high school graduation. So they chose to never drive drunk. It was rule that was never made to be broken. "Of course Em." Emmet waved his goodbyes and Edward focused on his computer for another hour.

He finally decided to give it up for the night knowing everyone had already left the office an hour ago. He grabbed his keys to his car and closed his office door behind him. Made sure he locked it and went outside to climb into his Volvo. It was silver and hugged the road just right. The bar was a good forty-five minutes away from his office. After his long drive he parked his car far from the door of the bar. Not his choice, that was just the last parking spots left.

He opened the heavy wooden door to Showtime and could smell the cigarettes and spilled beer. His eyes adjusted to the dim lighting as he made his way through the crowd. Many people he knew called hi out to him as he maneuvered to the bar. He stopped and ordered a Bud Ice. It quickly appeared with the chill still escaping the mouth of the bottle. He handed the bartender a five and took a quick swig of the cold beverage. A light hand touched his shoulder and he turned his head to see Jessica Stanley.

"Hey Edward. Are you here for the party?" Jessica asked with her bloodshot eyes staring at him.

"Hey there Jess." Jessica was younger then Edward by a couple of months. She was thin and liked to wear her clothes tight to show that off. She was also well endowed. She had been married three times since high school and was divorced three times. She liked to ride the mechanical bull that was in the back of Showtime and she was good at that. Her blue eyes were made by contacts and her hair was dyed fire red. He knew that because she liked to ride him about as much as the bull. And there was no mistake that she wanted to make him husband number four. But he had backed off so she would get that idea out of her head.

"Yeah I'm here for the party. Has it gotten rowdy yet?" Edward asked while trying to ignore the lust in her eyes. There was no need to give her anymore husband number four ideas. He liked her plenty, he just didn't want to marry her. Or anyone else for that matter. He took the bottle and put it back to his lips and took a long swig as Jessica downed her Jagerbomb. He grabbed the change from his five dollars off the bar and shoved it in his pocket.

"Not yet." Jessica said with an inviting smile.

"Ah," Edward said trying to not give her anything to work on. "See you around then," as he turned to leave.

Jessica's next five words stopped him in his tracks. "Have you seen Bella yet?"

Edward felt the bottle slipping from his hand but his hand quickly grasped the bottle tight. He was going to need all the alcohol he could find after that question. He turned back to face Jessica.

"I saw her this morning. She was at the store. I think she borrowed her sister's car. She was picking up some stuff." Jessica said as she order her next round of Jager while shaking her head. "What has it been? Ten, twelve years?"

Fifteen, he thought.

After she downed her next shot, she smiled. " I know it was her though. Bella Swan hasn't changed much."

But she wasn't Bella Swan anymore. She was Bella Black and had been for the last fifteen years. And while she may still appear to be the same to everyone else, her new last name had changed everything.

Jessica didn't seem to be phase by any of this and took a step closer to Edward to play with the buttons on his Ralph Lauren dress shirt. "I was deeply sorry to hear about Jacob Black. I know he was your friend for a long time."

Yes Jacob Black had been Edward's best friend. Ever since they had met at basketball practice when they were five. Jacob would go with all of Edward's hair schemed idea no matter the risk. But that had changed as well. The last time he had seen Jacob was when they'd had a fight that ended with blood while Bella looked on terrified. Actually that was the last time Edward saw Bella.

Jessica mustn't have noticed Edward's icy look in his eyes because she kept going. "Imagine dying at our age. It was truly a tragedy."

"I have to go Jessica," Edward said as he pushed past her to Newton's party. She had almost forced him to bring up an old anger. One that he had suppressed all these years. But even as it had come dangerously close to exposing itself, he was able to push it back down and keep it locked up and hidden.

With his trusty beer in one hand he pushed the curtain hiding the bachelor party from the outside world. He leaned against the wall and watched the man of the hour, Newton laugh nervously while the strippers danced around. They'd had started without Edward and was already in their g-strings as they danced to The Thong Song. They removed their silk tops at the same time to reveal their size double d breasts crammed into tiny bejeweled bikini tops. Edward's eyes slid from their big breasts and toned stomachs back down to their g-strings tied at their tiny hips.

Tyler Crowley had stopped next to Edward and watched the show with him. "Do you think they're real?"

Edward shrugged as he lifted his beer to his lips and took a drink. "Who cares right?" Edward asked. Tyler must have been married for way to long because he was starting to sound like a woman.

Tyler nodded. "Yeah your right," he said as he pushed his hair back. "Hey did you that Bella Swan is back in town?"

Edward tightened his grip on his bottle and nodded his head yes. "Yeah I've heard."

Again his old anger began to rise to the surface. But again he pushed way down again until it was forgotten. Edward focused on the show that the strippers were putting on. They had sandwiched Newton between their half naked bodies while they kissed above his head. All of the guys went wild watching it. Their open mouth, tongue thrusting had everyone screaming for more. Edward watched with a smile. This was getting too good.

"I saw her today at Dairy Mart," Tyler said ruining the moment for him. " And damn if she didn't look as good if not better then she did in high school."

Edward's eyes dropped to the floor as thoughts of her chocolate brown eyes flooded into his mind. Her perfect lips pouting. That was one black hole that he didn't want to reenter.

"Remember what she looked like in her cheerleader uniform?" Tyler asked while he elbowed Edward in the side.

Edward nodded and pushed himself off of the wall. He didn't want to go down memory lane if it involved Bella. Unfortunately everyone else in the room did.

As the strippers took off their tiny tops, the topic of conversation between all the men was not the beautiful Jasmine and Carli, but of Bella. And while Edward made his rounds, Eric Yorkie, Seth Clearwater, and Chad McDermott all asked him if he'd seen her yet.

Whatever her reasons for being in town, he'd hope it would be a short visit. Then everyone would go back to their everyday normal lives. And would let men enjoy half naked women standing just four feet away from him. After Chad had asked him if he'd seen her, Edward decided to leave the party. He set his empty beer bottle on the bar as he walked past it to the door. Leaving was the only way to get past all of the talk and excitement that Bella had created. But with each movement he made, thoughts and memories of Bella flooded back to him. He saw Bella dancing around in her old sweats in her bedroom. He remembered the feeling of her warm, smooth skin as his hand felt her leg underneath her black and gold cheerleading skirt. Her dark brown eyes with lust and excitement in them when he had taught her about sexual things.

The rain pelting his head and Jessica brought him out his memories. "Leaving so soon?" Jessica asked as she walked towards him.

"It was a boring party," he said as he looked over at her.

"Well we could make a party of our own if you want." It was typical of her. She didn't wait for him to make the first move. Normally that wasn't Edward's style, but tonight he approved as she raised her mouth to his. He could taste the Jager and the neediness she brought with her. Her firm breasts touched him through her thin wet shirt and desire began to tug at his gut. He pulled her against him tighter until lust and rain was all he felt. All memories of brown eyes and cheerleader skirts were replaced with the woman in his arms.

Bella Swan stood in front of the glassed house with her fist raised to knock on the door. It was the same as she remembered except the grass was somewhat brown, but other then that it was the same. Her stomach twisted into knots as the rain beat against the overhang of the small enclosed porch

The porch where she used to sit between Edward and Jacob. The three of them, best friends. They would laugh and joke. There wasn't many things they had done, that this porch hadn't been involved in.

But the thunder and lightening in the sky brought her back to present time as she stood frozen in front of the door.

Bella was never good at confronting people at a young age and wasn't much better now at 33. She'd improved a little bit, but she still didn't like to face problems head on. Still maybe she should have called first before coming over. It wasn't polite to just show up on someone's porch at ten at night. And she was soaked to the bone from all the rain.

Before she had left Abby's apartment, she had made sure she looked perfect. She had straightened her brown hair to the t and applied her make up perfectly. She had chosen a baby blue polo and a pair of metro black slacks. She had made sure that every crease was perfect on her outfit and that there was no wrinkles. But after getting out of the car and dashing to the door in the downpour, she was sure her hair had curled back up. Which meant it was frizzy and out of control. She hadn't use waterproof mascara so she probably had long black streaks on her cheeks. And her top was soaked and she probably had mud on the bottom of her pants from the holes she had stepped in. Everything in her body told her to turn back around.

But she still she stood planted in front of Edward's door. She had been in town for three days and still hadn't been there to see Edward. She had to tell him what she had been keeping from him for fifteen years.

She raised her fist to knock on the door she knew so well, but before her fist met the door, it swung open. She saw an outline of a man who was shirtless. There was a soft light coming from deep in the house and she could tell that the man's hair was a mess. Yeah she probably should have called first.

"Um, hi," she said quickly. She didn't want to run away. "I'm looking for Edward Cullen."

"Well if it isn't Bella Swan." the man said with a little distaste in his voice.

In the fifteen years since she had been home, his voice had become deeper than it had been when she had known him. But there was no mistaking the ugliness in his voice. No one could pack more hate into his voice and still make it sound musical then Edward. She didn't kid herself. She knew what was going to come wasn't going to be pretty.

"Hi Edward."

"What do you want Bella?"

Bella stared at the shadowy figure that stood in front of her. The knowledge that she had once known him pulled the already tight knot in her stomach tighter. " Well I….I am……I need to talk to you. And I-I thought…" She had to pull herself together. She was an intelligent adult, not a stammering idiot. "I wanted to tell you that I was in town before someone else did."

"Too late." Silence followed after that. The only noise was the rain falling on the overhang. The rain continued to hit her in the back as she stood watching Edward's outline. And when she thought he wasn't going to talk again, he did. "Well if that's what you wanted to tell me, you can leave now."

But that wasn't the only reason she had come over. She had a letter in her pocket. A letter from Jacob. He had written it a couple of months before he had died. She needed to tell Edward the truth, then hand him the letter. And then she could leave. "I need to talk to you. Its important."

Edward's shoulders moved and he walked from the door. He hadn't shut the door which meant that Bella could come in. Even though he hadn't slammed the door in her face, he hadn't gone out of his way to open the screen door for her. But then again this didn't surprise her. When did Edward ever try to make anything easy?

She followed Edward's outline into the kitchen even though she didn't need his help finding it. She had basically grown up here too. She knew her way in here like the back of her hand. She could smell fresh paint though, but was half surprised to see that the kitchen looked exactly as it had from all those years ago.

Edward opened the refrigerator and leaned into it and all Bella could see was his fingers grasping the handle of the door and his nice round butt bent over. But he'd always had a nice butt. There was no denying that. He finally settled on his bottle of milk and slammed the door shut. He opened it and brought the bottle to his lips but Bella's eyes were focused on the small amount of dark hair above his Levi jeans and around his navel. Her gaze went up his muscular chest. And she knew this wasn't the boy she had known.

She looked at his mouth and his hair that he wore in the same style he had as a child. But it wasn't till she looked into his eyes that she felt her mouth go dry and her stomach drop. His eyes had once looked at her with such passion and want. As if they couldn't go a day without her. But now they looked at her as if she wasn't worth more then a stray cat who needed some warm milk.

"Did you come to stare at me?"

She walked closer to the island that was still in the kitchen and tapped her finger on it. "No, I just wanted to tell you that I was in town visiting Abby and Alice."

He lifted the milk back up and took another swig of it from the carton as if he was waiting for her to expand on this.

"I just thought you should know."

He looked over the milk jug at her and met her gaze. Even though Edward had been a bad boy and a ladies man, he's always liked his milk. Some things never change. "And what makes you think that I give a shit Bella?"

"Well, um, I didn't know. I mean I wondered if you did care or if you would care," she said as she twisted her words up. This was much harder than she ever imagined.

"Well now you don't have to wonder." He looked at her for a moment then pointed to the other room with his milk carton. "If that's all, there's the door. Don't let it hit you in your ass."

"No that's not all." She paused as she felt for the letter in her pocket. Like it could give her some magic courage. It didn't help. "Jake wanted me to tell you that he is sorry. No that he was sorry. This is harder then you can imagine." Edward's face never changed. "Its hard for me to think of him in the past tense you know? Like if I do, that means he's gone forever. Which he is." Bella paused. "The flowers you sent were beautiful."

"Angela sent them." Edward said as he shrugged his shoulders. He tossed the empty milk carton in the trash can.

"Angela?"

"Angela Webber. You know one of your best friends. She married Ben Copely. She works for me now."

"Well then thank Angela for me." But she knew Angela hadn't sent the flowers and signed his name without his knowledge.

"Don't make it a big deal."

Bella frowned and looked at him. She knew how important Jake had been to him. "Don't pretend that you don't care that he died."

"You forget that I tried to kill him," Edward said with one brow raised.

"You would never have killed him Edward."

"No you're right. You just wasn't worth it I guess."

Bella saw that the conversation was heading in the wrong direction. "Don't get ugly."

"You call this ugly?" he said with an evil laugh. "This is nothing. Stick around and I'll show you how ugly I can get love."

Bella already knew how ugly Edward could get. But even though she was a coward, she was also stubborn. Edward might not be the same boy she used to know, but she was definitely not the same girl he knew. She just had to tell him about Anthony and then she could leave. She would have told him the truth. And it would be over.

A flash of blue caught Bella's eye. A woman dressed in a man's blue dress shirt had entered the kitchen.

"Hey everyone," she said as she came to a halt next to Edward.

Edward looked down at the red head and said, "I thought I told you to stay in bed."

"I got bored up there by myself."

Bella's cheeks began to redden. Edward had a girlfriend. She didn't know why that surprised her. He's always had one or two. Hardly did Edward go without a girlfriend. At one time that would have killed her.

"Hi Bella. I'm Jessica Stanley. I don't know if you remember me."

It didn't kill her now though. She had come all the way from New York to tell him about Anthony. But Jessica made relief wave over her. She was more of a coward than she thought. Bella smiled at the girl and moved closer to shake her hand. "Of course I remember you. We had Human Behavior together our Senior year."

"Mrs. Bowman."

"That's right!"

"Remember when she sat down in her chair and the chair completely broke underneath her?" Jessica asked as if she wasn't just standing there only in a man's shirt. Which no doubt was Edward's.

"That was so funny, I about--"

"Excuse me, what the hell do you two think this is?" Edward interjected. "A damn high school reunion?"

Both of them looked up into his eyes and Jessica said, "I was just trying to be nice to your guest."

"She isn't my guest and she's leaving." He kept his uninviting eyes on her. They were cold and she wanted to run and hide.

"Well it was nice to see you Jessica," she said.

"Same."

"See you later Edward," she said as she walked towards the door. Edward stayed planted with his arms across his chest. A definite unwelcoming move.

When Bella had reach the outside, she let out a huge sigh of relief. The rain had stopped and she dodged the massive puddles that had been left behind on her way to her sister's Jetta. Next time she would call before she just stopped in on somebody.

Just as she reached for the door handle, she felt a strong force whip her back around. She stared into Edward's eyes. The coldness had been replaced with something much worse. Rage. Rage that seemed to have been built up for years.

"I don't know what you came here looking for. Whether it was absolution or forgiveness. But you won't find it." His voice was calm with rage in it. He suddenly dropped her arm like the touch of her burnt his hand.

"Yes, I know I won't."

"Good, you stay away from me Bella. Or I'll make your life a misery."

Bella continued to stare into his eyes. His passion or anger hadn't been faded away in the last fifteen years.

"Just stay away." And then he turned from her and walked back to his house.

She would have been wise to listen to his warning. Unfortunately she didn't have a choice.

And unknown to him, neither did he.


	2. Chapter 2

-1**A/N: So I'm not sure if I'm going to continue the story because it's not getting a big feedback. So I might try one more chapter after this and see where it goes. As always I don't own Twilight or any of Meyer's characters. Yeah it is a little ooc but it's more fun to write about a popular Bella. Abby is her little sister if that was confusing. And yes Alice and everyone will be here soon! Please R&R! Much love LilD**

Bella blew on her coffee as she brought it to her mouth. It was still dark out and her sister was fast asleep. Abby's kitchen had been decorated by a pro, Bella thought as she glanced around it. Everything in the room was chrome. Not only chrome, but matching chrome. The cabinets and island were matching wood. And the floor was the black and white checkered pattern that their mother had favored.

Quietly Bella slipped from the kitchen into the small walkway by the door. She grabbed a black jacket that hung on the back of the door and placed her feet into a pair of her sister's flip flops. She then went out onto the small porch outside and sat in one of the lounge chairs. The early morning cold air hit her bare legs and sent chills up her spine. Her hair blew softly about her shoulders and she wasn't concerned. It relaxed her. The Washington air put her at ease. It was different then the New York air. She didn't know how to explain it but it was.

She was home. Only for a short time, but she was still at home.

Don't get her wrong. She loved New York. The shopping. Fine restaurants. The Yankees. And anything else one could find and love in New York.

But Bella was born and bred in Washington. It was in her blood as much as her brown hair and eyes were. It was like the birthmark in a shape of a love bite just right above her right breast. Like her birthmark, the town hadn't changed much. Sure more people had moved in. And they had rebuilt her beloved high school. But other then a couple of new department stores and a Wal-Mart, the town was exactly as she remembered.

Bella glanced around Abby's porch. It wasn't small by any means, but it wasn't New York sized either. It was made for Abby though. And it too, like the kitchen, was well decorated. The lounge chairs were a deep red and there was a tiny coffee table that matched them in the middle. Abby had placed plants and flowers galore on the porch. She'd always been the eco-friendly one in their family. Bella noticed that she had spider plants, their mother's favorite.

She took a sip of her coffee that had been somewhat cooled by the nice morning air. She laid back a little in the lounge chair and closed her eyes. She hadn't slept well the night before and knew she looked like she had been through hell and back. Her eyes were puffy and her mind felt like it was still asleep. Up until last night's encounter with Edward, she had thought her vacation plan was as exact as she needed. Visit her old town, sister, and old friends for a couple of days. Find Edward and tell him what she needed to tell him. And then it would be over. In twelve days, she would have conquered all that she couldn't in the last fifteen years. However Edward had slashed those ideas.

She had known it would be complicated but straightforward. She and Jacob had talked about it before he died. She still had the letter in her pocket from last night. A letter Jake had written to Edward before he lost the capability of writing and his train of thought. Jacob had wanted to hand deliver the letter to him but there was no way for him to do that. When Jacob had accepted that he would depart this life, he wanted to right all the wrongs he had done to people. Edward was one of them. Jacob was going to mail the letter to Edward, but Bella and him decided it should be hand delivered. The only person to do that was Bella. When it all came down to it, Bella was the one who wronged Edward the most.

Neither one of them had ever meant to keep Anthony a secret from Edward. Abby knew. Alice knew. Emmet knew too. Even Anthony knew he had a father named Edward who lived in Forks, Washington. Jacob and Bella had told him as soon as he could comprehend the fact, but he never articulated any want of meeting Edward. Jake was enough father for him and always had been.

It was definitely time to tell Edward. Well maybe it was a little over due. She took another sip of her now chilled coffee. A fifteen year old son with a blue Mohawk, a lip and tongue piercing, and chains hanging everywhere on him.

Anthony had a hard time for the last two and a half years. When Jacob had been diagnosed, the doctors had given him six months to live. But Jake had pushed through the six months and survived for two years. But those two years wasn't easy on anybody, especially Anthony. There was times when Bella was so focused on Jacob's needs, she neglected all of Anthony's. There had been plenty of times when he would come home and she would reprimand him for not calling or telling her where he was. He would look at her with his bright green eyes and say, "Mom I told you I was going over to Keith's. You said I could." She would have to drop the conversation because it was entirely possible that she did in fact tell him he could. Normally the reason why she would forget is because she would be so focused on something, such as Jacob's new medication or the surgery that was planned for next week. While that was hard enough on her, it was heart breaking to see him lose abilities he'd had since he was four or five. The days when he forgot how to use a telephone, turn a key in a door, or even tie his shoelaces, were the days where she would forget all conversations she'd had with Anthony. It was like chunks of her memory were taken away with each thing Jacob's disease took away from him.

The day that Anthony walked in with his blue Mohawk was the day that brought Bella's focus back on her son. He was no longer her little boy. The little boy that needed her help for simple things. The little boy that would curl up on the couch and watch the Disney Channel with that special toy or blanket. The little boy that would give her a hug and kiss every night before bed. It wasn't even the hairstyle that had brought her back. It was the look in his eyes. The lost and scared gaze. It had brought her out of the depression that had engulfed her for the six or seven months after Jacob's death.

Jacob was gone. Bella and Anthony would always feel the pain of his passing. Jake had always been her best friend. Someone who could comfort her and make her feel better. He had made her life easier. He'd been a devoted husband and father.

Jacob would always be important and in the back of their minds. But she had to move on from the past. Not only for herself, but for Anthony. And the only way to move on, was to get rid of what was left in the past.

And that involved her not hiding from it.

The morning sun began to hit Bella's skin and she felt the warmth. She wished she had her Sony camera to take the pictures of the sunrise. The sky was beautiful and the shadows it created was breathtaking. The rays hit her legs, arms, and face, and she closed her eyes to soak it all in.

New York living had never cured her of seeing a Washington sunrise. It just never was the same in New York. All of the businesses and the streetlights took away all of the sunrises claim to fame. It was so beautiful. Jacob would have loved it. Bella wished he was there next to her in the other red lounge chair taking it in.

Bella looked down at her manicured toenails in the pink flip flops on her feet. She wished for a lot of things. A lot of things that could never come true. Like more time before she had to see Edward again. She had planned on him being angry, but not as downright mean as he was. He was pure ugly the night before. But it stunned her that he still hated her as much as he did the last time he saw her.

_You call this ugly? _he'd asked. _"This is nothing. Stick around and I'll show you how ugly I can get love."_

She wondered if he realized he'd called her love. He had called her that ever since the first time they had met in second grade at Forks Elementary.

Her mind wandered back to that first day. She was so nervous that morning. She was beginning a new school halfway through the year and she was sure all the kids would hate her. And she was also sure that the bow her mom had plopped on her head made her look stupid. Her mom had snatched off a welcome basket that their new neighbors had sent them. It was big, red, and stupid looking. Bella had tried to fight with her, but her mom insisted that it matched her dress perfectly.

All morning on that first day, no one had talked to her. She was certain that it was the stupid bow she adorned on her head. By lunch time, she was so troubled that she couldn't eat her PB&J sandwich. At recess, she stood by herself by the fence that encased the playground. Finally, Edward and Jacob had walked up to her while she stood there trying to hold back Texas sized tears.

"What's your name?" asked Edward.

Bella looked up into his emerald eyes and smiled. Someone was talking to her and her heart made a loud thump. "Bella Swan."

Edward kicked at the stones that lay by the fence and ran his fingers through his already thick copper hair. "Well love, that is the stupidest bow I have ever seen." Then Jacob and him had both broken out in a loud laughter.

Bella frowned and touched the bow defensively. There was no way she was going to let these two boys get the best of her. "Well you two are so stupid, even together you can't count to twenty." Bella had been proud that she had stood up to them. Of course, being Bella, she defeated the whole purpose by breaking down and crying.

A sad smile crossed her face as recalled her first day. She had vowed to hate them both till the day she died. That lasted about a week, until they asked her if she wanted be on their softball team. It had been Jacob who had taught her second base and how not to be afraid of the ball. She owed all of her thanks to him for still having her nose intact.

When Edward had fist called her love, it was a joke. A way to tease her. But as they grew older, he would whisper it into her throat as they kissed. In his deep voice, he would find other ways to tease her. Even now, the thought of his kiss sent shivers down her back and left her wanting more.

Bella thought back to the night before and how good he had looked half naked. His eyes had been in his half sleeping mode and his lips curled in his trademark half smile. He was definitely hotter then she remembered. But now she was older and was able to resist the temptation. She was no longer tempted by good looks or a bad attitude.

Anthony didn't really resemble Edward much. His attitude was similar and he had the same shiny green eyes but that was were it ended. Right now he was staying with his aunt, Jacob's sister, and uncle in Manhattan while Bella was back in town. He knew the reason why she was here. She had learned not to lie to him, no matter how well intentioned they may be. However, she had chosen his last week of ninth grade so he couldn't come with her. She wasn't sure how Edward would react, although she was quite sure he wouldn't be nasty to Anthony. But after last night she was sure she had made the right decision. Besides she didn't want Anthony to have any more pain in his life. He's already endured enough.

She heard her sister in the apartment and she got up to go inside.

"Good morning Abs," Bella said as she hung the jacket back on the door. She kicked the flip flops off by the closet and grabbed a seat by Abby on the sofa. Abby wore her blue satin robe and fuzzy matching slippers. Abby also had a child who was sleeping in his little bedroom, but Abby's husband was a no show. That was because they were going through a divorce. Abs always referred to him as a rat bastard. "I watched the sunrise. It was beautiful." Abby nodded as she used a claw to hold her messy brown hair up. Bella smiled up at her and asked, "How was the party last night?"

"It was okay. I didn't find any guys though." Abby answered. She was a member of the posh country club in town and believed in going to all the parties there. She was going to make sure she was going to get her money worth. "But I did see Lauren Mallory there." Abby brought her coffee mug to her lips and took a sip. "She was looking old."

"She's only 33 Liz," Bella said. Lauren was one of Edward's many ex's. Abby had always liked Lauren when Edward went out with her, but at some point the two had been on the outs. "Are you and Lauren talking again?"

"Nope," Abby answered simply. Bella raised her eyebrow at her expecting a reason.

"Well if you must know Bells. Remember when her and I worked at Main Street Café together?" Abby asked. Bella nodded her head yes. The two had been waitresses together Abby's senior year of high school and while Lauren was in college. "Well she was always telling me how she made a dollar more then me because she was a better waitress. And I could never understand that. I always made bigger tips then her. Well anyways, one day I went into the stock room to get another pad for orders. And I found Lauren making her dollar more an hour by other means."

"Like?" Bella asked.

"With Mike Newton."

Bella remembered the manager. Mike was definitely a lady's man and would try anything to get some from any girl. "She was having sex with Mike in the storeroom?"

Abby pursed her lips together and shook her head. "No, more like oral gratification."

"That's criminal!" Bella said shaking her head in amazement. She never expected that of Lauren. Well maybe just a little bit.

"Yeah it is. It was pretty much prostitution."

"No I meant it was more like slave labor for Lauren. She blew Mike for what, eight dollars a day? That's not right-"

"Bella!" Abby exclaimed while she grabbed frozen waffles out of the freezer. "Peter is in the next room!"

"Well Abs, you brought it up. And what is the difference between oral gratification and blew?" Bella questioned as Abby just shook her head to dismiss the subject.

"Do you want some waffles?" Abby asked.

"No I don't eat breakfast." Bella answered while she refilled her coffee cup.

"Did you go out last night?" Abby asked while she went into Peter's room to get him up for the day.

What she really meant was, did you get the nerve to go over to Edward's. "Yeah, I went over to his house last night." Bella replied.

"Well did you tell him?" Abby asked as she put Peter into his highchair.

Bella shook her head slightly as she inspected her fingernails. She had chipped a lot of her red fingernail polish off. "I was going to, but his girlfriend was there. So I decided it wasn't the best time to tell him."

"Maybe it's a sign that its better left alone. Its not really hurting anyone Bells."

Growing up, Edward was always the one in trouble. Abby had always been more fond of Jacob. She always blamed Edward when everything went wrong. No wonder why she didn't invite Edward to her wedding. "I can't do that sis," Bella answered.

"Well I don't understand why not. Its been fifteen years. Why trudge up the past?" Abby asked while Peter threw cheerios on the floor.

"I already told you why," Bella answered irritated. She wasn't going to discuss the reasons again. There was no need. She grabbed a bottle of nail polish that was on the table and began to repaint her nails.

"Well don't go over there tonight. People will talk. And you don't want that Bella. Since you're a widow they will think your desperate."

"I don't care anymore what people say." Bella said as she blew on her nails.

"Well you should," Abby said as she sat across from Bella with a waffle. "You don't want them thinking you are going over there for relations." Abby had use her fingers for air quotes around relations. She always tried to protect Peter from everything.

Bella bit her lip from laughing. It had been over two years since her last real relation. And she wasn't sure she knew how to use it anymore. After Jake had been diagnosed and first surgery, they'd tried to have a normal and happy married life. But after a few months, sex had become to difficult. She had missed having it with her husband. But the longer she went without it, the more she lost interest in it. Now she hardly thought about it.

"So tell me who did your kitchen?" Bella asked to change the subject.

"A guy name Roberto. He did a nice job didn't he. That was when Kevin wasn't such a creep." Abby said as she picked Peter up and put him on the floor. "Well it was nice when I had a husband who would pay for everything." Bella nodded knowing Abby would go on and on for hours.

"Hey you remember Jamie?" Abby asked. Bella nodded. Of course she remembered Abby's first love.

"Well I saw him last night too. He was with this ugly girl." Abby continued to gossip while Bella just shook her head yes at points and got up to wash her mug out. Abby had somehow become entrapped in the gossip world. A picture caught Bella's eye while she washed her mug out. It was a picture of Jacob and Anthony on his fourth birthday. They were both wearing funny party hats and smiling like morons. Bella had sent the picture to Abby and was pleasantly happy she had hung the picture up.

"…and I just don't think she's right for him, you know?" Abby asked while Bella caught a glance at a grocery list.

"Yeah. Hey Abs, are you going to the grocery store today?" Bella asked.

"Yeah I thought I would get it over today. After church tomorrow, Alice and Jasper are coming over for a Sunday dinner." Abby said as she turned on _Sponge bob Square Pants_ for Peter.

"I'll go for you. Just spend the day with Peter and whatever else you want to." And besides Abby had a ham on the list for dinner. This way Bella could get something else than a ham. After Jacob had died, many well meaning people had dropped off spiral hams to her. Many which were still in the freezer. Abby nodded a thank you.

Bella took a shower then dressed in a pair of jeans and a button up shirt. She quickly put her hair up and put on hardly any makeup. She grabbed the list and stuffed it in her purse and grabbed the keys to Abby's Jetta. The car was practically new and it was a nice blue green color. At least she had gotten a nice car before the rat bastard ruined everything.

Inside Wal-Mart, Bella began to throw things into the cart. A can of coffee, some tea bags, and some different kind of meats. She heard the song "Copa" playing in the background and laughed the thought of Anthony's dance he created for it.

"Hey Bella! I heard you were back in town."

Bella glanced up from the packages of hamburger she was trying to decide between. A young girl about Abby's age stood in front of her. Her hair was up in curlers and she was carrying a can of hairspray. It took Bella a second to put a name with the familiar face.

"Your Kate Denali. Tanya Denali's little sister." Bella and Tanya had cheered together their senior year. They had been good friends but when she moved to New York with Jacob, she had lost touch with her. "How's Tanya?"

"She's good. She lives in Seattle with her husband and kids."

"Seattle?" Bella rested her foot on the bottom rung of the cart. "Shoot, I was hoping to stop in on her and say hello. I didn't know she moved away."

"She's in town this weekend for my wedding."

Bella smiled. "Your getting married? When? Who are you marrying?"

"I'm marrying Garret over at The People's Church. Its tonight at seven."

"Garret?" She'd gone through high school with him. He was a trickster and had always given Emmet Cullen a run for his money. He was definitely not the person she thought Kate would be marrying.

"Don't look at me like that," Kate said with a laugh.

Bella realized her mouth was hanging open and closed it. "Congratulations. I'm sure you'll be very happy."

"Come to my reception. Its at the country club. It starts at eight."

"Crash your wedding?"

"It's going to be a big party. We hired a local d.j. to play too. And I'm sure Tanya would love to see you. And my mom and dad too. You were like family."

Mrs. Lamont had been their cheerleading advisor. Mr. Lamont had made alcohol in his garage. They had broken into it and Bella remembered it could burn your throat. "Maybe I will."

"Good! I'll tell Tanya I ran into you and your coming to my reception. She'll be so ecstatic." Kate said as she nodded her head quickly.

Bella hadn't brought anything to wear to a wedding reception. Maybe Abby would have something she could borrow. "Are you registered anywhere?"

Kate laughed and replied, "You don't have to get me anything. But yes I am. Karen's Gift Shop." Of course Karen's, everyone always registered there.

"See ya tonight," Kate said as she walked away.

Bella smiled to herself. Innocent little Kate Denali marrying partier Garret James. People did change overtime apparently.

Except maybe Edward.

He never seemed as if he would settle down. He was always the first one to pull a crazy stunt. No matter what the risks were. Jacob was more of a daredevil then Bella was. But Jake couldn't even hold a light to the things Edward did. Nobody really could. Jacob was always the more dependable one while Edward rushed through life as if it was his last day to live. Being friends with the craziest boy in school had been a lot of fun. Getting romantically involved with him had been a huge mistake.

A mistake that Jacob, Bella, and Edward had all paid a high penalty.


	3. Chapter 3

-1**A/N: I'm not getting much feedback on this. I still have three more chapters written. So unless I start getting more feedback I think I might just delete this story. Alright let me know what to do. Much love, LilD**

The country club sat on the edge of the eighteen hole golf course. A wooden bridge that was replaced a couple of years before was the only way to get into the club. It was over the small man made river that always had lily pads floating in it.

Quarter after eight, Bella pulled into the well lighted parking lot and speared into a parking spot next to a BMW. This was the first event, well just going out, that Bella had gone to by herself since Jake's death. It was a strange feeling. More like a panicky feeling. It was as if she had forgotten something at home. Like going to a movie and thinking you forgot the tickets even though you know they are tucked safely into your purse. She wondered when this panicky feeling even went away. Until she could go out alone and feel used to it.

And dating? Just forget that one. Bella never thought she'd ever be ready for that.

Bella entered the large glass doors and caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror in the foyer. She smoothed her hair with her hand and placed her other hand lightly on her stomach. She wore a red sleeveless cocktail dress she borrowed from Alice. Bella was taller then her pixie friend by a few inches and her chest was a size bigger. Red was normally not condoned as a color to wear to a wedding but it was the only one that Alice had that wasn't too tight across her breasts or too short.

The dress has silk covered buttons that ran up the side to her armpit, and Abby's small red purse hung at her shoulder.

Bella walked down the stairs to the reception room and spotted the table for gifts. She placed her gift on the table that she had bought just hours before. She glanced around the pink and brown decorations to spot the bridal party getting a traditional picture taken by a hired photographer. Bella noted that he was using a small digital camera.

At least three hundred people saluted the happy couple with their flutes of champagne and cups of beer. Bella glanced at her left and saw the tables all set up. Pale pink tablecloths adorned the tables and brown pillar candles lit them in a soft glow. There were two long serving tables filled with roast beef, noodles of all kind, and many other foods for the taking. Most of the guests were seated while still others walked the room saying hi to one another.

The photographer wasn't using a video light to capture the glow of the room, which Bella thought was too bad. If she'd been hired for the shoot, she would have brought a number of cameras and numerous lenses in her gearbox. She would have used 1600 color film in this particular room with auto flash and video light to enhance the ambiance of the room. Every photographer worked differently though, she thought to herself, and his photos would probably come out just fine.

"……to Garret and Kate James." someone toasted.

Bella grabbed a flute of champagne and put her full attention on the bridal party. She lifted the flute carefully to her mouth and took a sip while her eyes glanced down the line. She smiled as she swallowed when saw her old friend, Tanya. She was wearing a long pink dress with a light brown bow across her middle. She also looked very pregnant. She was still as short as Bella remembered and pretty even though she looked very tired. And she even wore her hair in the same long unruly blonde curls look she trademarked in school.

Kate looked beautiful as the bride with her blonde hair in soft curls under her very white veil.

Even Garret looked better then she ever remembered him. Or maybe he just cleaned up in the tux.

"Excuse me ma'am," a voice that she would never forget said as she stepped out of the doorway to the room. Her eyes looked behind her at Edward Cullen's shining green eyes and crooked smile.

His eyes locked with hers as he passed and his jacket brushed against her bare arm. He halted with shock for half a second and within that time passion seemed to fill his eyes. Just as quickly as it had came, it left and Bella wasn't sure if it was just the lighting in the room or her mind playing tricks. He moved past her and went to greet the bride and groom. His copper hair touched the back of his jacket and it looked as if he had finger combed it. Like he had been wearing a hat and tossed it into the backseat of his car before he came into the building. The suit made him look as if he had walked out of a fashion magazine. And just like he always had, he walked with his trademark easy, laid back stride, which made it seem like he had no where to go in a hurry.

Butterflies fluttered in her stomach. But it had nothing to do with how good he looked, but what he meant to her and her son.

"Isabella Marie Swan!" Tanya yelled above the music. Bella took her gaze off of Edward and put it on her friend. "You get your skinny butt over here!" Tanya had always had a loud voice. It made up for everything. It had made her a great cheerleader.

Bella laughed and walked up to the front of the room. The only spot left to stand was right next to Edward who was speaking to the groom. She hugged her friend and Mr. And Mrs. Denali. Tanya introduced her to her husband, Justin, then said, "You remember Garret James right?"

"Hey Bella!" Garret said as he flashed her his white teeth. "You look great."

"Thanks," she replied as she looked over at Edward who was doing a great job of pretending she wasn't alive. She noticed he was wearing a baby blue dress shirt but no tie underneath the jacket. She returned her full attention to the groom. "You look good too. I can't believe your married to little Kate Denali. I remember when Tanya and I tried to teach her how to ride a bike and she ran right into a tree."

Kate laughed and Garret replied, " I bet you thought I would be too busy trying to become the next Bill Gates or something to get married!"

In the tenth grade she had competed against Garret to become the class president. They both had lost to Alice but he'd even ate worms to get votes. He was also one of the most goal oriented kids in their high school, he'd even been one of those hated prefects. "The thought had never entered my mind!"

Kate laughed knowing better. Bella felt herself relax. The butterflies calmed. This wasn't the night to talk to Edward. Tonight was a night that she could just be herself and be around old friends and have fun. It had been a long time since she'd had any kind of fun.

"Hey Edward, you remember when you, Jake, and me got arrested for racing cars out on the highway?" Garret asked.

"Sure do," Edward replied while he pulled up his shirt cuff and glanced at a silver watch.

"Were you there that night, Bella?"

"No." She glanced at the man next to her. "I never liked it when Jake and Edward raced cars. I was always afraid that someone would get hurt."

"I was always in control," Edward said as he dropped his hand to his side and his fingers brushed the side of her dress. He lowered his gaze to her, and said without any hint of expression in his eyes, " I was always safe."

Being with him had never been safe.

"I was really sorry when I heard about Jake." Garret said and Bella returned her gaze to him. "He was a good friend."

Bella never knew what to say when people said that, so she brought her lips to her glass and took a sip.

"Kate told me had brain cancer."

"Yeah." It had a name. Glioblastoma. And it was always horrible and fatal.

"I was gonna try to get a hold of you to see how you were doing." Tanya told Bella.

"I'm doing fine," she replied. It was the truth. She was doing fine. "When is that baby due?" she asked purposely changing the subject.

"Next month thank God!" Tanya replied while she rubbed her stomach. "I can't wait for her to get out of my stomach! So do you have any kids?"

"Yeah." She was more than aware that Edward was standing so close to her, she could feel his jacket. A tiny step toward him she would have been able to feel the texture of the sleeve and the coldness of the button at his wrist against her bare arm. "His name is Anthony." She purposely left his age out of the answer. "He's in Manhattan with Jake's sister, Rachel, and her husband Quinn." She stole a quick glance at Edward and saw that the blank expression he'd had all night was now gone. His green eyes were filled with surprise and he was lifting a brow at her. "You remember Rachel right?"

"Of course I do," Edward answered and quickly looked away.

"I remember her too," Tanya said while she nodded her head. "She was a lot older than us as I recall. But then again so were Jake's parents."

Jake had been a pleasant surprise for his parents when they had him in their mid-forties. They had both been sixty three when he had graduated high school and married her. His mother had passed on before Jake had. His father lived in a retirement home near La Push.

"Kate and I are going to get to work tonight on making a baby," Garret said as he laughed and grabbed her into his arms. "I don't want to wait too long to have a baby!"

As the happy bride and groom laughed loudly, Edward reached into the pocket on his jacket and pulled out a cigar. "Congratulations buddy," he said as he handed it to Garret.

Garret grabbed it and wriggled his eyebrows at Edward and smiled. "My favorite, thanks!"

"Hey don't I get one?" Kate protested with a bright smile on her face.

"I didn't know you liked cigars, hon," Edward said as he reached for her hand. He took her small hand from her side and brought to his mouth. "Congratulations, Kate. Garret's a very, very lucky man." He kissed her hand lightly and said barely above a whisper in her ear, "If he treats you bad, you just let me know."

Kate smiled the bright Denali smile and touched her hair with her other hand. "Are you going to be my prince in shining armor for little oh me?"

"For you always," he said as he dropped her hand and excused himself.

Bella watched as Edward's broad shoulders walked away from the group to the bar that had been set up in the corner.

"He always could charm the pants off any girl," Tanya said with a sigh. "Even in the fifth grade."

She turned her attention to Tanya while the others began to talk amongst themselves about hockey and what team was better or not. While their debates raged on, Bella leaned her head closer to Tanya.

"What happened with you and Edward in the fifth grade?" she asked her friend.

A longing smile played at Tanya's lips while the two of them turned their focus on Edward ordering a beer at the bar.

"Come on, tell me!" Bella coaxed.

"He talked me into showing him my bottom."

_In the fifth grade?_ Edward, Jake, and her had been playing basketball. Not doctor. "How?"

"He told me if I showed him mine, he'd show me his."

"And that's all it took?"

"I don't have brothers and he didn't have any sisters. We were curious at the time. And nothing bad happened. He was a real sweetheart about it."

She'd never know while he was boring her with stats from his favorite baseball teams, that he had been running around getting other girls to show him their bottoms. She wondered what else she didn't know about him.

"Don't tell me you were friends with Edward for so long and never showed him yours!"

"Not in the fifth grade."

"Buttercup, sooner or later, everyone has shown Edward their bottom." She rubbed her stomach again with her hand. "It was just a matter of time."

Bella was seventeen and virtually had to beg him to look at her bottom. If her memory served her correctly, his words had been, "Stop Bella. I don't mess around with virgins." But he had, and they had begun a uncontrollable sexual relationship that they kept hidden from everyone. Even Jake. Especially Jake. It had been passionate and exhilarating and powerful. A roller coater ride of love, jealousy, and sex. A ride that had ended very badly.

Long forgotten memories rushed back into Bella's head. Memories that she had pushed so far back in her mind. The ones she had taped up and wrote never remember on and pushed into the most far point in her mind. It had taken her years to forget them and package them up. And it had only taken minutes for someone to rip the tape and ruin her years of hard work.

She remembered her own wedding. It had been a small intimate wedding at the city hall. His parents and her dad stood with them. Jake held her hand to keep it from trembling. She'd love Jake Black for years before they got married. It may not have been that burning love that she had felt for Edward. And she may not have craved him like a drug, but that kind of love never lasted. It would burn out after time. And what would be left? The love she felt for Jake was comfortable and welcoming. It was the type of love that felt like coming home on a cold winter night and snuggling up in front of the fireplace. The love they shared last a lifetime. And would go on past Jake's passing.

Her mind brought back the two of them in his car, driving to Edward's home to tell him about their marriage. Her pregnancy had made her sick to her stomach and she felt like she was going to throw up. What they were about to do made her chest tighten up. When they turned down that familiar long driveway, Texas sized tears had began to stream down her face. Again Jake had held her hand.

Jake and her had been through a lot together, and everything had brought them closer. Their first few years of marriage while he attended college had been financially tough on them. But when Anthony had turned four, Jake landed a good job and they decided it was time to add a second child to their family but found out that he had a low sperm count. They tried everything under the sun to conceive a child, but nothing worked. After five tough years of trying, they decided to give up and were happy with their lives.

Suddenly the room went dark and Bella came back to the present. A spotlight showed on Kate and Garret on the dance floor while the d.j. put on their wedding song, _Lost in the Moment_. They began their first dance as husband and wife.

When Bella had come back to tell Edward about Anthony, she never expected all the memories to rush back to her. She had forgotten they were there all together.

Bella moved away from the dance floor and placed her empty glass on a table and walked to the bathroom. She washed her hands and looked at her reflection in the mirror. She was no longer a scared and confused teenage girl. Nor was she heartbroken over Edward anymore. She was a lot tougher now. While she didn't want to relive the memories, she was fairly sure she would have too. She was here to tell Edward about Anthony. And while she would tell him she was deeply sorry and hope he could understand, she was fairly sure he wouldn't understand and would make it more difficult. But she couldn't run away anymore. She had to tell him about Anthony and do the right thing. No more hiding.

She reapplied her bright red lipstick and dropped it back into the her purse. Let Edward do his worse. She might even deserve some of it. She had already survived some of the worst stuff life could throw at her and survived it. And nothing Edward could do, could be that bad.

Bella stopped at the bar and ordered a screwdriver, then made her way back to the banquet room.

Edward stood at the doorway with one shoulder against the wall. His right hand held a cell phone to his ear while his other hand was in his pocket. He glanced up and watched her as she moved toward him.

"That's fine," he said into his Blackberry. "I'll see you at the office on Monday first thing."

Her first urge was to hurry past him, but she stopped in front of him. "Hi Edward."

He ended the call and put the phone back into his pocket. "What do you want Bella?"

"Nothing. Just being friendly is all."

"Well, I don't want to be friendly with you." He straightened himself from the wall and took his hand out of his pocket. "I thought I made myself clear last night."

"Oh you did," she said as she took a sip from the glass. "How is Emmet doing?" She hadn't seen him in years. She had talked to her best friend Alice Brandon over the years who had told her he had married a girl named Rosalie.

He looked over her head and replied, "He's good."

She waited for him to elaborate. He didn't. "Last I heard Em's wife was pregnant again. And that Alice is engaged to Jasper Whitlock finally."

"Yep."

"Where's Jessica?" His gaze met hers and he quickly snapped them back up to somewhere behind her head.

"At Showtime I guess."

"She's not here?"

"I don't see her, do you?"

Bella took another sip of the alcohol in her hand and smiled. She was going to be pleasant if it killed her, or him. "You didn't bring her with you?"

"Why would I?"

"Isn't she your girlfriend?"

"Now whatever gave you that idea?"

They both knew what gave her that idea. "Oh I don't know, Eddie, maybe that fact that she was only wearing your shirt and nothing else." She saw his face grimace at the childhood nickname he loathed so much.

"Your wrong about that. She was wearing a black lacy thong on that shirt." Edward's lips turned into his trademark smirk. He was trying to provoke her. What a jerk. "And a satisfied smile. You remember that smile right Bells?"

She wasn't going to lose her temper and give him what he wanted. "Don't flatter yourself Edward Cullen. You weren't that memorable."

"What? I was talking about Jessica's smile last night!" His lips smirked at her while his eyes were shining with laughter. "What were you talking about love?"

They both knew he wasn't talking about Jessica's smile last night. "You haven't changed much since high school." She gave him her death look and walked away before her temper got the best of her. And before she said something she might regret. Like maybe that he should grow up.

Edward watched her go. His smile flat lined and his gaze slid from her straight and silky dark brown hair down the back of her red dress to her rear and the back of her thighs. What gave her the right to judge him? She'd screwed around with his emotions. Said she would love him forever then married his best friend the same week he buried his parents. In his book, that made her a hardcore bitch.

She disappeared into the banquet room and Edward waited a couple of minutes before following. At thirty-three, Bella was more beautiful that she had been at eighteen. He'd seen it last night in the kitchen. Her hair was still the deep dark brown, although much shorter than she'd worn it in high school. She'd grown an inch maybe two, which would have made her five foot five. But she still carried herself like she was the queen of prom. Her large brown eyes were still rich and dark, but they had lost the innocence and passion that Edward had loved about them.

He walked into the hall and entered the dark room. Newton stopped him to talk to him about his new car he had just bought.

"It has its original 427," Newton told him while the d.j. played _Last Night_ by P Diddy and Keisha Cole.

Like a magnet, Edward found Bella in the crowd in seconds. She stood on the side of the dance floor talking to Ben Copely and Angela. Bella's red dress hugged her curves just right without making it look too tight. Evidently, Bella hadn't gotten too fat. Didn't have thick ankles or a droopy butt either. But where Edward stood that seemed like a shame.

For years he had forgotten about Bella and Jake. Buried them deep into the pockets of his mind. And now here she was, dredging them all up again.

Eric Yorkie approached her and she followed him to the middle of the dance floor. Everyone knew that Eric was a horny bastard and would take the buttons on the side of her dress as an invitation to let his fingers do the walking. Maybe that was what she wanted. To get something going with Eric. It didn't matter though. It was none of Edward's concern.

Eric wrapped an arm around Bella's waist and she smiled up at him. The light from the small spot lights caught Bella's hair. Her red lips parted as a laugh came out. Bella Swan, the fantasy of every horny guy from their high school, was back in town leading guys on with a smile.

Some things never changed.

Only she wasn't Bella Swan anymore. She was Bella Black with a kid. A son. A baby with Jake. He didn't know why that surprised him. It shouldn't have. Of course they had a kid! What should have surprised him was they only had one.

Unanticipated and uninvited, the memory of her flat stomach rushed in his brain. His mouth tasting her bare skin just above her navel as he gazed up into her face. At the hot drowsy passion in her eyes as he worked his way down. Her lips moist and roughened from his kiss.

"Excuse me," he said just as Newton got into another story about his new car.

He walked toward the glowing red exit sign and out the doors. He moved down the hall and out the front doors of the country club. The warm June night touched his face and throat. The sound of insects were loud and lighting bug lit up like a soft yellow Christmas lights everywhere. A recollection of catching lighting bugs with Jake and Bella. They would catch them with Esme's mason jars and then smears the bugs on their arms. The fluorescent streak would last a good ten minutes.

He pulled a cigar out of pocket and twirled it in his fingers for a second. He walked over to the bench by the club's pond and sat. He patted down all his pockets in search of the match book he had bought with the cigars. Edward didn't smoke much but when he did, he favored expensive cigars.

Coming up empty, Edward placed the cigar back into his breast pocket of his dress shirt. He ran his hand through his thick rusty colored hair and sighed as he rested his head back to look at the sky. He had more clients and cases then he could imagine having. He owned the home that his father and mother had owned when he was a teenager. His BMW was worth close to seventy thousand after all the extras and he had a Chevy Silverado to lug his twenty-one foot boat behind it.

He was satisfied, so why did Bella have to come and dredge the past back up. The past that was better left buried and never spoken of again. Memories of him and her. Of Jake and him. Of the three of them.

From the first day in elementary school, Jake and him had both been a little in love with Bella. It started out innocent though. Two little boys looking across the playground and seeing a little girl with chocolate hair and big brown hair. And back then she could play baseball, swing from the monkey bars, and outrun them. It had started out uncorrupted and youthful.

In the third grade, Bella had worried about who she was going to marry. Her mother had just died and her father was alone and she didn't want that to happen to her. The three of them had decided she would marry both of them and they would live in their tree house. Jake would become rich by becoming a lawyer. Fame and fortune would come to Edward by way of baseball. And Bella would be a beauty queen winning award after award. They'd never heard of polygamy, and neither Jake or him had thought of Bella in a sexual way. Not that he and Jake hadn't thought about sex. Just not about Bella.

All that changed the summer going into the ninth grade. Bella went to visit her aunt and uncle in New York and by the time she had come back, she had popped out two perfect looking breasts. She'd left looking like the same skinny, flat-chested girl they'd always known, but she'd come back changed. Her legs longer. Her breasts bigger then his hands. Her hips fuller. Even her hair had seem shinier.

Back then, his body had never even needed a reason to get an erection. It was something that happened to all teenage boys for no reason at all and was embarrassing as hell. It sometime happened while he was doing nothing more exciting then history homework or mowing the lawn.

But that summer, he'd taken one look at Bella, and his body had reacted to two well-defined reasons pressed against her tank top. His thoughts had dropped right down to his crotch, and he's gotten so hard he'd about passed out from lack of blood to his brain. She had come over to tell him about all the excitement in New York, and while she was sitting there telling him about the things she had done and laughing, all he could do was stare at her breasts.

That summer, Jake and Edward knew they both were attracted to her and that it was no longer innocent. It was there between them. And for the first time in their comradeship, they had a big problem. One that wasn't going to be solved by a slug on the arm or an apology.

Later they talked about how they felt about Bella and decided neither one of them could have her. It was the only way to remain friends. They promised that Bella was off limits and to keep their hands off of her. Edward broke that promise, but Jake had ended up with her.

The front door of the club swung open, and as if his memories had conjured her up, there Bella stood. She glanced around the parking lot as if she forgot were she parked her car. She swung her purse strap back onto her should and took a step down when she caught Edward's look. Her gaze locked with his, and she stared at him across the distance. The light from the front of the club lit half of her up while half of her was in a shadow.

"Kate's going to throw the bouquet in a minute." Bella said as if Edward had asked. "And I don't want to pretend to catch it."

"You don't want to get married next?"

Bella shook her head no and her hair swept back and forth on her shoulders.

He didn't ask why. He didn't want to give a crap. His stare moved to her full breasts pressing against the red material of the dress and down the buttons on the side of the dress.

"This morning I was thinking about my first day at Forks." she said and took a step closer to him. "You remember that?"

"Nope." he replied as he stood and looked into her face.

Her red lips turned up in the corners as she said, "You told me my bow was stupid."

And she'd burst into tears.

"My mom made me wear that stupid thing."

He looked down into her face with her perfect smooth skin, straight nose, and full red lips. She was as beautiful as always, even more so, and he was doing a darn good job of feeling nothing. No anger. No desire. Nothing. "What are you doing here?"

She took another step closer to him. If he reached out, he could have touched her. Bella stared at him with her big brown eyes and said, "I saw Kate at Wal-Mart today and she invited me to her reception."

That wasn't what he meant. "Why are you back in town? Dredging up the past?"

She lowered her gaze to his chest and didn't answer.

"What do you want Bella?"

"I want to be friends."

"No."

"Why Edward?" She looked back up to his face, searching. "We were friends once."

He laughed loudly. "We were?"

She nodded. "Yes."

"I think we were more."

"I know, but I mean friends like in before all that."

"Before all the sex?"

He wasn't sure, but he thought he saw her blush. "Before the sex."

"And before you had sex with my best friend?" He folded his arms across his chest. Maybe he did feel something. Maybe he was a little more pissed off then he thought, because he said, "Are you here to start things back up? Continue right where we left off?"

She looked away. "No."

"I know I'm not suppose to flatter myself, but how about we tear one off in the backseat of my car?" She shook her head, but he didn't stop there. "For old time sakes?"

Her gaze returned to his. "Don't Edward." She raised one finger to his lips and pressed it against them to quite him. "Don't say anymore."

He was caught off guard by the touch of her finger. He caught the scent of her perfume. But under the perfume he smelled her. Bella. She might cover it with perfume and move away for fifteen years, but it hadn't changed one bit. Even at seventeen, when she worked at the local diner; even beneath the smell of coffee and fried burgers, she'd always had her own unique, hypnotizing smell.

With her finger pressed to his mouth, he stared at her for several long seconds. Sometimes he'd had to search hard for the scent of her beneath all that grease but he always found it. Usually in the crook of her neck. He grabbed her wrist and pushed her back. "What do you want from me?"

"I told you! I want to be friends."

There had to be more. "We can never be friends."

"Why?"

He let go of her wrist. "You married my best friend."

"You broke up with me!"

No, he told her he needed more time. "So, to get back at me, you married Jake." It really wasn't a question. More a statement of the truth.

She shook her head. "You don't understand. It wasn't like that."

It was exactly like that. "You and I were lovers. We were doing it every which way to Sunday. Then you up and marry my best friend the same week I bury my father and mother. Then Jake and you moved to New York while I was still in Forks with Emmet figuring everything out. What part did I get wrong?" Through the dark he saw her crease her brow.

"The timing was real bad."

Bitter laugh escaped his lips. "Yeah."

"I'm sorry Edward." She looked sorry too.

He didn't care. "Don't be. It all worked out for the best."

"I came back here because I have to talk to you Edward."

There was absolutely nothing she had to say that he wanted to hear. "Save your breath Bella," he said as he walked past her towards the entrance of the bridge that separated the parking lot and the club.

"It's the reason I'm here," she called after him.

"Then you've wasted your time."

"Don't make me chase you."

That stopped him in his tracks and he turned back around to look at her. She had her hands on her hips and she stared at him intently. It was like looking at the old Bella again.

"I'm trying to be nice about this, but you really don't have a choice. Your going to listen to me; and if you get ugly like you said, I'll become your worst dang nightmare."

Damn, she was the old Bella. All hot temper and feisty belligerence wrapped up into such a soft girly package. He almost smiled. Almost.

"Too late, love," he said as he turned back around to leave. "You became my worst nightmare years ago."


	4. Chapter 4

-1Bella hung her dress in the closet and pulled the red slip off over her head. She reached for her short night gown and pulled it over her head. Then she scrubbed her face clean and put her hair in a ponytail. It was a little after ten and her sister was already asleep after a long day with Peter.

She sat on her bed and dialed Anthony in New York. She was sure he was still awake.

She was right. "Hey sweetie," she said after he picked up on the fifth ring.

"Mom."

Well it wasn't the greatest conversation starter but at least it was something. And she was sure glad to hear his voice. "How are things goin?"

"Gay."

"I miss you honey."

"Then come home."

"I will a week from Sunday."

"Mom, I do not want to stay here for another week." Anthony stressed the 'do not' into the receiver.

She'd already had this conversation with him before she'd even left. Rachel and Quill were not his favorite relatives nor people. Not that they were horrible to him. But they were boring. Especially to a hyper active fifteen year old. "It can't be that bad."

"How do you know? Have you ever stayed with Aunt Rachel and Uncle Know-it-All? Huh?"

"Anthony Masen! They'll hear you!" But as the nickname inferred, Quill was the kind of man who knew a little about everything and was always boring you with facts you never wanted to know. It was Jake who had started calling him Know-it-All when he told Jake an hour full of tidbits on a wide selection of things.

"No they won't. They're not even here. They left me to watch Kelly and Lucas. I'm like their built in babysitter."

Bella cradled the phone between her shoulder and ear while she reached for the glass of water she had put on her nightstand. "Kelly is only a year younger than you!"

"Yeah I know she is. She keeps following me around and asking me stupid questions like does food get stuck in my lip ring. She's a pain in my butt mom."

Bella thought that was a fair question since she had asked him that too. "I think she has a crush on you Anthony."

"Oh my god mom! How can you say that? That is so gross," he said into the phone with his voice cracking with resentment. "How can you say something that nasty? She's my cousin!"

"Haven't you ever heard of kissing cousins?" Bella asked him in a teasing voice.

"Revolting mom, seriously. She still picks her nose!"

Bella laughed and the discussion changed to school. There was only five more days until he would get out for summer vacation. He had just turned fifteen in December and could only count the days towards two things. His drivers license and graduation. Since first grade he had been counting down the days until he got his drivers license. And since sixth grade he was marking the days off the calendar till his graduation. He only had one more year to go until his drivers license and three until graduation. He already had his major and car picked out.

"I'm gonna get a Nova Super Sport. A four on four, too. None of that wussy three speed crap either. Why bother if you can't burn them off? It'll be fat." Bella didn't ever bother to pretend she knew what he was talking about. Like Edward, he knew a lot about cars. It was in his DNA to be gear crazy. Plus there was a pretty good chance he had been conceived in the backseat of a Volvo.

"What color?" Bella asked not one bit concerned. Anthony didn't have a job so there was no way he would be able to burn them off in a Nova SS.

"Yellow with a black top."

"Like a bumblebee?"

Anthony hesitated then replied, "White with a black top. And I got a brochure from Drexel University about law, mom." Anthony was destined to be a lawyer. That was also programmed into his DNA.

They talked for another five minutes about the weather and where he wanted to go on vacation when she got back. Anthony had just seen a teen skin flick and thought Fort Lauderdale sounded good. Or Hawaii.

By the time she hung up the phone, they pretty much had decided on Disney World. Although that would probably change the next time she talked to him. She squirted some raspberry scented lotion onto her arms and rubbed it in. A thin strip of white skin was on her finger where her wedding bands use to be. Wedding bands that had been there fifteen years. She had slipped the two carat solitaire into the breast pocket of Jake's burial suit. She thought it was appropriate that it lay above his heart.

As she rubbed the lotion into her hands, she glanced around the room where she was staying. When Abby and her soon to be ex-husband bought the apartment, she had taken all of her and Bella's stuff out of storage and placed it in the room. But when Bella had called her to tell her she was coming for a visit, Abby had told her some of her stuff was in the guest room closet. The bed in the room had also been her own bed from her youth. Framed pictures of family hung all over the room. Bella smiled at the picture of her mom, Abby, and her when they had gone on vacation somewhere.

Bella stood and crossed the room to the closet. In it hung a couple of her old prom dresses. On the floor were her favorite pair of sneakers and a big box with Bella scrawled on the front of it in bold, black marker. She scooted the box across the floor to the bed. She plopped on the bed and stared at the box. She knew what was in it. Memories she had taped a long time ago shut. Bits and pieces of her life. The same memories that had surfaced at the reception that she suppressed. Now here they were, looking at her. Did she really want to look through her past?

No, not really.

She tore the tape off and opened the box.

On top laid her graduation tassel, a dried wrist corsage, a picture of her and the cheerleading squad, and a few nametags that said Hi My Name is Bella. She wasn't sure why she had saved the nametags, but the corsage she knew. She touched the dry rosebuds that were now a dusty yellow, but in her mind still appeared to be the same pink and white they once were. She brought the corsage to her nose and took a deep breath. They smelled of years of dust and memories. She sat it next to her and continue to dig through the box. Her baby blanket and baptism gown were next. Then a heart shaped box with the necklace that her granddad on her father's side had given her at sixteen was next along with her yearbooks. She took her ninth grade yearbook out and flipped through the pages. She turned to the picture of the teaching staff. She had taken that picture before she knew about lighting and composition and had been in her first year of photography class.

She continued to turn the pages and landed on the cheerleading pictures. She spotted herself and Tanya in the group and smiled. The picture had been taken of them in their black and gold cheerleading uniforms doing Herkie, toe touch jumps, and handsprings. That was the year Bella had dyed her hair blonde like the rest of the team. While they had all looked like preppy cheerleaders, Bella looked like Casper the Ghost.

She flipped to her class picture and blushed. Her smile was filled with braces, and she had so much make up smeared on her face she looked like a clown. Thank God she had met Alice soon after

Another few pages, and her finger landed on Jake. She smiled at the touch of his photo underneath her finger. He'd always been such a handsome boy with his black hair, brown eyes, and a big grin as if he didn't have a care in the world. He played baseball and basketball and been involved in student government. He'd even gone on to win school president their senior year.

Bella thumbed a couple more pages and looked at Edward's photo. Unlike Jake, Edward didn't grin and smile as if he didn't have a care in the world. It wasn't that he was more intense than Jake, he just didn't waste energy on smiling and laughing when he didn't feel like it

.

During that school year, Edward had turned sixteen. A year older than Anthony was now. They both had the same copper hair color and bright green eyes. Bella looked for more similarities but found none.

That was also the year that Edward had quit baseball because his grades had slipped so much. Up until his sophomore year, Edward had always been the team captain. When he quit, Jake had taken up his position. As far as she recollected, he'd never had any bad feelings toward Jake about it, only an unhappiness that he could no longer hit the ball.

That was also the year that she started to fall in love with Edward. Oh sure, she'd always loved Edward the same way she loved Jake, but it seemed as if she had looked at him the same way she always had, and in the next everything she had changed.

On that particular day, he'd been waiting for Jake to finish baseball practice, sitting on the bleachers. She'd stayed after school to make posters for the homecoming dance and had decided to make a short cut through the baseball field to the parking lot and saw him sitting there waiting for Jake and watching, instead of playing.

Possibly it was the lighting that made him shine in a brighter light. She didn't really know, but his good looks seem to jump out at her more that day. More than his messy hair. More than his slight stubble on his jaw. More than his arms folded across his chest and the defined balls of his biceps and the hard cord of muscle of his forearms. Edward did not life weights. He lifted car engines at his new part time job.

"Hey there love," he said as he patted the bleacher next to him.

"What are you doing?" she asked as she sat next to him. She placed her books on her lap and stared out onto the field. She watched as the players retreated to the locker rooms to change.

"Waiting for Jake."

"Do you miss playing Edward?"

"No, but I do miss the pretty girls." It was of course true that the baseball players did get the cutest girls. But it wasn't true that Edward didn't get his fair share.

"Yeah, you're gonna have to settle for the ugly girls now." She laughed as she looked at him in the corner of her eye.

"Bella, don't you know there aren't any truly ugly girls in Forks?"

He was full of it. "And where did you get that enlightening piece of information?"

He shrugged and smirked. "It's a fact is all. Like you know, someone walking on the moon and your gonna use algebra in your life." He took her hand and brushed his finger softly over her knuckles as he studied her fingers. Bella's heart began to thump loud in her chest. Edward was acting kind and loving. It sent tingles down her spine. "You'll still be seen with me, won't you Bella?"

She turned her head and watched him in full sight, all prepared with a flip answer, but he glanced up at her and something in his green eyes stopped her. For a flash, she saw something, something in his eyes, something in the way he looked back at her, something that made her think that her answer was important. As if he wasn't sure. She got a unanticipated look inside of Edward that she'd never seen before. Maybe he didn't bounce everything off like he was superman. Maybe he did feel things just like everyone else. Maybe more.

Then he flashed her his crooked smile and it was gone.

"Of course Edward," she replied. "I'll always be seen with you."

"I knew I could count on you love."

For the first time, his voice slid inside her chest and warmed her up with hot tingles. It was all so incredible and absurd, and left her bewildered. And it absolutely could not happen. She couldn't fall in love with Edward. He was her friend. And she didn't want to lose him. But even if he hadn't been her friend, she still would have been an idiot to let that happen.

He squeezed her hand and stood, "Do you need a ride home?"

She looked up at him with his fingers going through his tousled hair and nodded. Edward Cullen had a lot of pleasant qualities. Being faithful to one girl was not one of them. He'd shatter her heart like glass. If that happened, they couldn't be anything. She'd miss him terribly.

By the time Jake had walked out of the locker room and up onto the bleachers with his hair still wet from the shower, she had persuaded herself into believing that she wasn't falling in love with Edward. He'd made her momentarily confused. Like when they were kids on the merry-go-round. He used to spin it so fast for a while after she couldn't think or see straight.

But she was over it now. Thinking straight once again. Thank God. "So are you guys going somewhere?"

"Yeah. We're going over to La Push," Edward replied.

"What's in La Push?" she asked.

"There's a '69 CamaroZ-28 that Matt wants me take a look at." Matt was Edward's boss and was a sucker for old cars. He'd also made Edward a fan of older cars, even ones that didn't run.

"A '69?" Bella never did understand what the big fascination of an older car, or classics as Edward now called them, was. She preferred newer styles with leather seats. Not like she could afford a new car. Her dad was the chief of police raising two girls. Money was a hot commodity. Jake and Edward on the other hand came from families with money. Jake's father was a lawyer and his mother a doctor, while Edward's dad was the top surgeon around. They rarely had to worry about money. "Does it run?"

"Not yet."

Exactly.

"Hey Bella," Jake said as he approached her. "Why are you at school so late?"

"Making homecoming posters." she answered quickly. "Are you going to the dance?"

"Yeah. I'm thinking about asking Leah Clearwater. Do you think she'll go with me?" Jake smiled and there was no doubt that Leah would say yes.

Bella shrugged. "Are you going Edward?" she asked even though she knew the answer already.

"Nope. You know I never put on that suit in my closet unless my mom forces me to go to church or a funeral." He grabbed her books out of her hands and carried them as they walked to the car. "The last time I wore a suit was at a wedding. And you know I hate to dance."

Bella knew from experience that it wasn't that he didn't know how to dance, he just never felt like it.

"You could just wear a nice shirt and tie. Like that one I just bought you.," she informed him, but the fact that he wasn't going to be asking another girl to go made her happier than it should have, given that she was over her former confusion.

"Not a chance," he said as she got into the backseat of the four door Volvo. Edward got in and shut the door and revved the engine.

"Have you even been asked yet Bells?" he asked her as they pulled out of the parking lot.

"Yes." Edward had been weird about who she dated ever since she had broken up with Sam and Jake was always a little stand offish about it. Some things never changed. So she didn't want to say.

"Who?" Jake asked as he twisted himself in the seat to look at her.

She looked out the right hand side window intently ignoring his question.

Jake slapped her lightly on the shoulder. "Come on Isabella Marie. Who asked you?"

"Demetri Volturi."

"Your going with Booger?"

"He doesn't like to be called that anymore."

Jake and Edward looked at each other which irritated Bella.

"What is wrong with Booger…..I mean Demetri?" She held up both of her hands before either one of them could answer. "Never mind, I don't care what either of you think. I'm going with him."

"He gets around a lot."

"He's the wrong kind of boy for you," Edward added.

She crossed her arms across her chest and was quiet for the rest of the ride. The pair of them were serial daters, and that was putting it in the nicest way she could. She didn't care about their opinion. Especially Edward's. When did she ever listen to him? And if there was any wrong guy for her, it was Edward. This made her even more glad that she wasn't falling in love with him.

She spent most of that year going out with boys that neither one of them approved. On more then one occasion Edward and Jake told her dates what they thought was wrong with her to scare the potential boys away. And like most girls her age, she learned to make out and drive boys crazy. And more important, she learned when to stop before things went to far. This resulted in her being labeled as a tease. Bella didn't find this fair at all. Boys kissed her. She kissed them back. As far as she could tell, a girl was either a prude, which meant she didn't kiss at all. A tease, meaning she kissed and perhaps a bit more, or a slut. And everyone knows what that meant.

That summer she let Mike Newton touch her breast on the outside of her T-shirt. Edward and Jake found out from mutual friends of Mike's and decided they would talk to her about it. They burst through her bedroom door and told her that was a slutty thing to do. And Edward couldn't have a friend who let Newton touch anything. Bella got so mad she slammed her bedroom door in their faces and refused to come out for days.

The hypocrites.

In her junior year, she made varsity cheerleader. Her hair was back to its natural brown color and was long. Jake was still in baseball, basketball, and of course student government. Edward was racing the Camaro he bought from Matt and bringing up his grades. And Bella continued to tell herself that she wasn't attracted to him in the least bit. She told herself that she loved him like a friend, but not in love with him. As if her heart didn't get a slight pinch when she saw him jumping in his Camaro with some random girl. Or when she saw him driving around with his arm around some girl in his Volvo. He was her friend, nothing more. She wouldn't let herself feel anything else either.

All that changed a few weeks before Christmas her senior year when she was asked to the Christmas Ball by Jackson Rathbone. Jackson was handsome and drove a new Mitsubishi Gallant. Red. Bella worked nights at the Forks Diner and saved enough to buy the perfect dress. It had a tight red bodice which was decorated by a gold jewels all over it. The bottom was fit for a princess. It was big and puffy. It had tulle on top of the red fabric. It was the prettiest dress she'd ever seen. The night before the dance, she picked up Jackson's boutonniere on her break. When she got home, he called and cancelled. He said his grandpa was sick and he to go out of town with his parents to take care of him. Everyone knew that he had started seeing another girl. Bella had been dumped.

And everyone knew it.

The next day at work, everyone told her how much of a jerk he was and she deserved better. She laughed and said she didn't care. Everything was fine. She wasn't sad or upset.

But everyone knew better. Getting dumped the night before a dance with some lame excuse that was a lie would suck for any girl that it happened too.

And everyone knew it.

After she was done at work, Bella went home and locked herself into her room. The red dress hung on her closet door, staring at her. Tears began to flow at a rapid speed and she buried her face into her pillow. Around five, her sister knocked on the door and asked her is she wanted some Moose Tracks Ice Cream. She said no and Abby had sighed deeply. Alice had tried to convince her to come out and let her play Barbie Bella, but she had refused until she left.

At six on the dot, Edward knocked hard on the door. She refused to open the door and let him see her like that. She was a mess and she didn't care to be made fun of. She wouldn't have been able to make up a good comeback.

"Bella," he said in a loud voice through the door, "Open the door."

"Go away Edward," she said as she pulled herself a Kleenex out of the box and blew her nose.

"I'm not in the mood."

"Open up."

"No!" Bella threw a pillow at the door hoping that would make him go away.

"I have something for you."

She stared at the door intently for a moment, as if she had x-ray vision and could see it.

"What?"

"I can't tell you. I have to show you. Open the door."

"I look really bad." She braced herself for his comeback.

"I don't care."

Well she did. She opened her door a crack. She stuck her hand out and grabbed for the imaginary item. "What is it?" He didn't answer and she was forced to peer out the crack. Edward stood before her door, the light from Abby's room shone on him like a dark angel or a choirboy. He wore a black suit with a black dress shirt and a white tie hung crooked at his neck. "What's going on Edward? Are you going to a funeral?"

He laughed his melodic laugh and placed his crooked smile on his face. He brought his hand out from behind his back and laid a wrist corsage of white and pink roses in her palm. "Will you go to the Christmas ball with me?"

"You hate school dances," she said through the crack.

"I know."

She brought the corsage to her nose and breathed in deep. Well not that deep because her nose was clogged from hours of crying. She bit her bottom lip from trembling. She didn't want to cry anymore. And as she looked at him, in a suit he hated and asking her to a dance he detested, she fell hopelessly in love with Edward Cullen. It made her heart beat quickly and it scared her to death. All those years of fighting it faded away to nothing.

She'd fallen in love with Edward and there was nothing she could do about it. Nothing.

That night Edward kissed her for the first time. Actually she kissed him. During the dance, while she continued to fall even more in love with him, he treated her like he always had. As a friend.

While he made her body feel hot and alive, he remained cool to the touch. It had been wonderful and awful, and after the ball, when they sat in his Volvo, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him.

At first he sat there with one hand on the gear shifter and the other on his leg. Then he seized her shoulders through her black shawl and pushed her away angry.

"What are you doing?"

"Kiss me Edward." If he rejected her, she was sure she would just die. Die right there in his car.

His grasp tightened and he brought her forward and kissed her lightly on the forehead.

"No, don't treat me like a friend." She swallowed hard. "Please," she whispered as she looked at him with her big brown eyes. "I want you to kiss me like you kiss those other girls. I want you to touch me like you do those other girls."

He pulled back quickly and he gazed at her for a moment. "Don't tease me Bella. I don't like it."

"I'm not teasing you." She ran her hand across the shoulder of his Edward's jacket and through his messy hair. "Please Edward?"

Then as if he didn't want to kiss her, but he couldn't fight it anymore, he slowly lowered his mouth to hers. This time the touch of his lips stole her breath. She tilted her head back and sank into his chest. Until that moment, she thought she knew what it was like to kiss a boy. Edward showed her she didn't have a clue. The kiss was hot and wet and filled with so much hunger that it changed her forever.

Even now, after so many years had passed by, Bella could still remember how she felt sitting in Edward's car that night. How he turned her world inside out. She'd clung to him as he fed her those liquid kisses that had made her breasts ache and her body tremble. His hands never moved from her shoulders, but he made her desire for his touch. She wanted him to touch her all over.

Instead he pushed her away and told her to get out of the car.

And she had stood there and watched him drive away.

**A/N: New chapter. Some of their history thrown into there. And Jackson Rathbone is my favorite from the movie so of course I had to make him make an appearance. I see I have a couple of alerts now so that makes me want to write at least a little bit more. And of course we'll have some outlooks from Edward and this story does not focus on Anthony. He's just important to the plot. Alright so please R&R and pass this story along to other readers. Much love and thanks, LilD**


	5. Chapter 5

-1The next day Bella called Edward but he didn't pick up the phone. The longer she put off telling him about Anthony, the harder and harder it was going to get for her. Actually she knew that already, seeing as she'd been putting it off for fifteen years. But what she hadn't grasped was that being back in town putting it off would bring up her memories. Before she arrived, the plan was tell Edward, give him Jake's letter, and deal with the fallout: if not easy, at least clear-cut. Now, it didn't seem as clear-cut anymore. But it had to be done. She was leaving in seven days.

Before noon, Bella tried twice more to reach Edward. Both times the phone continued to ring without avail. She presumed he was doing it on purpose. She went to church with Abby and Peter, and later, they had dinner with Alice. Jasper was suppose to be there, but he had important business to attend to so he regretfully sent his apologies.

Bella looked at Peter. He was two and he had the blonde curliest hair she'd ever seen. Abby couldn't bear to cut the curls off, so he had an afro of sorts on his tiny head. He had huge blue eyes which came from his father and he loved Thomas the Train. He always wore his little baseball hat and loved to scream NO! so loud that he could be heard by his cousin in New York. He hated food with texture, spiders, and his Velcro Spiderman shoes.

Bella looked on in horror as Peter poured the grape juice from his Thomas sippy cup into his mashed potatoes and then began to mash them with his hands. Abby and Alice sat across from her and was so deep into their conversation they didn't mind the disgusting mess that he was making.

"He's a rat bastard," Abby was telling Alice about her ex-husband's newest stunt. "A few months before he ran off with his jailbait girlfriend, he took all the money out of our joint account and squandered it off somewhere."

Alice nodded her head sadly at Abby. "Probably in Mexico. That's where it's the safest to squander money now-a-days." Bella laughed at the idea in her head, that if the three of them ever said bastard at the table, they'd have been sent from the room.

"What is your attorney doing about that?" Bella asked.

"There's not a lot he can do Bells. We can prove that the money was in the account, but not where it went! The judge ordered him to give me half, but that doesn't mean he will. And for years, Kevin was paid under the table in order to avoid paying taxes, so it looks like he only made twenty thousand a year instead of seventy five." Abby sliced a piece of meat with a vengeance. Growing up Abby and Bella had been close. That started falling apart Bella's senior year while Abby had still been in middle school. They constantly fought and doors were slammed. After Bella moved away, their relationship became stable again which was a good thing because after Jake died, she learned that family was important.

"He said if I bring that to the judge's attention, he'll fight for custody of Petey." Abby continued.

"What should I do?"

"You should really talk to Emmet or Edward, Abs." Alice replied. Bella looked at Alice. Alice had grown up a lot since the last time she'd seen her but she was still the same Alice that Bella loved. She still wore her hair in the same short spiky black do which complimented her face. She was still petite and thin but she seemed to had filled out a little. Her clothing was no longer the kind that screamed attention but now shouted sophisticated business lady. Bella also caught the sight of Alice's engagement ring which was the biggest rock Bella had ever seen.

"I was think about calling Em, since he did a lot of family justice in school." Abby replied and Bella could tell she was tired. Dark rings were under her eyes that she never noticed before.

"Go ahead and call. Emmet would be happy to help Bella's sister out." Alice said as she shoved food into her mouth.

"I ran into Demetri at the bookstore the other day." Abby said as she dug into the mashed potatoes on her plate. It was as if Abby's problems were solved for the moment. "You remember Demetri right? From the dance fiasco Bella?" Bella nodded her head yes. "Well I saw him and he has a kid. A kid! And I asked him who the mom was and he said that she had died when the little one was born. Isn't that just sad? And Demetri was a nice one sometimes. Well I got his number for you Bella." Bella rose an eyebrow at her sister. "Well he liked you in high school."

"And how do you know that?" Bella asked. If he had liked her, why did he dump her the night before the dance?

"Because I asked him at the bookstore! Aren't you paying attention? Well anyways I have his number in my purse and he said you should call him. His kid, I think he's three, is the cutest little guy ever. I think he said his name was Alec."

"Hey Abs, why aren't you getting me any numbers?" Alice asked as she dumped some ice cream in her bowl. Abby glared at Alice knowing full well she was being sarcastic.

Bella began to laugh. Alice looked over at Bella and she too began to laugh. Peter threw his baseball hat on the floor and began to laugh as if he knew the joke. He was only two, but he had been around the Alice enough to know what was going on perhaps.

Abby looked up from her bowl. "What are you two laughing at?"

"How things never change." Alice answered.

"Well I think the two of you have gone crazy and have taken my precious Peter with you." Abby said as she shook her head obviously confused.

After dinner, Bella tried a fourth time to call Edward. After working up the nerve to call him again, she was just let down by him not answering. Although this time she actually got a answering machine, so she left a simple message. "It's Bella. I'm not going anywhere until you talk to me."

He didn't return the call of course, so she called him the next day at work. She and Angela talked for a few minutes about the good times and she thanked her for sending the flowers to Jake's funeral. Then she asked for Edward. "Don't tell him its me on the here though," she said. "I want it to be a surprise."

"He could use a good surprise," Angela said. "He's in a spiteful mood this morning."

Great. Bella was put on hold and heard a good five minutes of some elevator type music before Edward came on the line.

"This is Edward Cullen," he said over the line.

"Hi Edward." He didn't respond, but he didn't hang up either. "Surprise! Its me Bella."

"Don't annoy me at work, love," he finally responded with some spite in his voice. Yep, he was in a bad mood.

"Don't make me. Meet me later."

"Can't. I'm flying to L.A. this afternoon."

"When will you be back?"

He didn't answer her and she was forced to blackmail him. "If don't you tell me, I'm going to be forced to call everyday. All day." That didn't prompt a response either. "And all night."

"That's harassment."

"True, but filing charges is such a pain." She never thought for a second he would actually do it.

"Let's meet the day you get back."

"Can't. It's Alley Marie's birthday."

"Alley Marie? Hooker or stripper?"

"Neither."

"It sounds like a stage name."

"Probably a girl named Bella Swan shouldn't cast stones."

He had a point. "Meet me after."

"No can do. Those dancing animals really take it out of me."

"Edward-"

"Goodbye."

The dial tone filled Bella's ear as she thought about what to do next. _Dancing animals? _What was Edward into these days? "Hey Abs," she called into the apartment. And over the sound of Thomas the train on the television, she asked, "Is there some place in town that has dancing animals?"

"Dancing animals?" The TV lowered, then Abby stuck her head into Bella's bedroom. "The only place I know is Magic Castle."

"Is that a strip club?"

"No! It's a pizza place, but it also does little kids' parties. I had Peter's birthday party there last year. He wasn't old enough though to understand that the big dancing alligator wasn't going to hurt him. He screamed until the paint came off the walls. Why do you ask?"

"Because Edward said he has a birthday party there for someone named Alley Marie."

"Alley Marie?"

"Un huh," Bella mumbled as she got up to get the phonebook to call Magic Castle. She had to find out what day he was going to be there.

"It can't be Allison. Well yeah it could be. Her birthday is in June." Abby said into the back of Bella's head.

Bella dialed the number to Magic Castle and Abby sat down next to her. After getting transferred four times by teenagers, she finally got in touch with the party planner. "Hi," Bella began. "I've lost my invitation to the birthday party of a little girl named Alley Marie. I'm not sure of her last name, but if we miss that party, my daughter will be so upset. Could you please tell me the time it starts?"

The party planner sounded older then the teens working there and it took her a minute to get back with the answer. "I don't have a Alley Marie, but I do have a Allison Cullen."

"That's it," Bella answered with her eyebrow raised.

"Her mother booked a table in the front from six to seven-thirty."

"On Saturday?"

"No Wednesday."

"Oh my gosh! I'm so glad I called. Thank you." So Alley Marie was Allison Cullen. Allison was obviously Emmet's daughter and Edward would be back on Wednesday.

"Was it Allison?" Abby asked. Bella nodded her head yes as she wrote down all of the information. "I should've know that. She's turning seven."

"Abs, do you wanna go?" Bella asked putting the plan into motion. She's warned Edward that she would be his worst nightmare and at the time she had been bluffing. Now she wasn't. She didn't plan on telling him about Anthony at the party, but he needed to know she wasn't going anywhere until he met with her.

"This will be good," Abby answered. "Not only can we take Peter, but I'm close with Emmet's wife, Rose. Plus Alice will be there seeing as she's best friends with Rose and Jasper is close with Emmet."

"Yeah that's true. Maybe we should catch a ride with Alice?"

"Yeah that's a good idea."

"Are you sure you want to take Peter with us? I mean you said yourself that he screamed up a storm." Bella asked as she got up to circle the date on her planner.

"He doesn't do that anymore." She got up and walked to the door and yelled down the hall.

"Petey, you're a big boy right? Aren't you momma's sweet baby?"

"NO!" Abby rolled her eyes and walked out of the room, leaving Bella to her thoughts.

**A/N: Short but sweet. Next chapter is from Edward's POV and shows some of the things he remembers. Plus the story takes off more after the birthday party for Emmet's daughter! So R&R! Much love, LilD**


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